i am one c.s. lewis calls a "prig"
or in other words i am nothing but a conceited, high browed, narcissistic, people hating (as well as self hating) jerk of a human.
i think it mostly comes from being afraid of rejection.
the old "i reject you before you can reject me" trick
now the problem i face is this:
i dont mind being this way.
in fact, i rather prefer being alone.
man, its weird going into the ministry with this kind of attitude. it is the exact thing i hate in "fake" ministers.
i know its wrong to be so exclusive, and condensending. but i enjoy it a great deal more than when i was the butt of peoples jokes.
in other thinking i recieved my "marriage quilt" from my grandma today. its called a marriage quilt because, so far, when she gives a quilt to one of her grandchildren they are married within the next year. of course they were all divorced before the third, but i still have my hopes up.
12:56 a.m. - 2002-08-02
Recent entries:
Awake in My Tiny Cage - 2014-11-03
God. - 2014-10-27
I remember me. - 2014-10-17
The Paper - 2014-10-13
A Post About Not Doing Anything - 2014-10-12
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