I am not going to marry Alayna.
I may not get married at all.
But there is a good chance that I will eventually find the right person.
I don't believe in soul mates.
Nor do I believe in destiny.
But I do believe that there is an ideal partner for me, and at least one person on this planet that closely fits that ideal.
The best advice I was ever given about relationships was this:
Stop waiting for the right person to come along, instead focus on being that right person yourself.
I wonder about my ideal romantic partner. What she values. What characteristics and temperament define her.
I wonder about the essentials and "non-negotiables." What are the things that I require in a partner? What are the things that make her perfectly suited for me?
All of this is important. Crucial, really. How will I ever recognize her if I don't know what to look for?
Knowing my criteria informs who I value and decide to seek out. It's not all about looks. Hell, it's hardly about looks at all.
So I wonder about my ideal partner; who she is, what she values, how she will support me and fulfill some of my needs.
But I also wonder about something that is just as important, if not more:
What is my ideal partner looking for in her ideal partner? And how many of those characteristics do I currently possess?
Do I possess the values that she is seeking out? Do I have the characteristics that she considers to be non-optional? How well will I support her and fulfill her needs?
Am I the kind of man that my dream girl dreams about?
So though I am waiting to meet her, I am not waiting idly. I am making myself better and stronger. I am becoming the right person.
An old blues musician once said that the reason musicians practice is so that when the music decides to use them they will be ready.
In that sense, I am practicing being a good husband and lover. I am practicing the values that I strive to possess.
So that when love decides to use me, I will be ready.
9:55 a.m. - 2013-08-06
Recent entries:
Awake in My Tiny Cage - 2014-11-03
God. - 2014-10-27
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The Paper - 2014-10-13
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