I've slept on it and still feel worse.
I am living hand to mouth by my hands are always empty.
What is wrong with me that I can never seem to get ahead?
I am intelligent. I am talented.
And I don't want to say that "I just can't get a break" because only losers say that.
Losers who lack self-aware and can't see that it is their own actions that cause them to constantly fail.
And I guess that's me. I can't see what I am doing wrong, but since I always fail and always fail the same way, it has to be me.
This all has to be my fault.
And there is no one here to save me.
I am going to work today and know that if I could just make a hundred dollars in tips I would be okay.
Well, not okay, but I could keep my head above water.
But it's Christmas Eve and I doubt I'll make more than twenty dollars.
And twenty dollars won't feed me.
I am seriously and literally facing homelessness right now.
Something has to change.
and soon.
No matter what it would do to my family and friends,
I cannot live like this anymore.
8:22 a.m. - 2012-12-24
Recent entries:
Awake in My Tiny Cage - 2014-11-03
God. - 2014-10-27
I remember me. - 2014-10-17
The Paper - 2014-10-13
A Post About Not Doing Anything - 2014-10-12
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