I dreamed about my wedding last night.
I've had dreams like this throughout the years. Each time more detailed. As if my subconscious is narrowing down on what it is that I am really looking for.
Last night's dream also seemed to be more symbolic and telling about my current situation.
First, the details about my "wife."
Throughout the dream she kept changing appearances. An amalgamation of girls that I have had unrequited crushes on over the years; which probably "means" nothing more than my subconscious just filling in the gaps.
However, hidden throughout all those familiar faces, there was someone brand new. I won't go into all of her physical attributes, because I am not sure I could really nail them down. What I can say is that she was very kind and sweet and really kind of perfect.
The wedding itself (as well as the reception, where most of the dream took place) was not filled with much detail. In fact, all I could see was the face of my bride.
The rest of the world was in soft-focus; as if it didn't matter at all. People would talk, but I could never make out what they said. All I cared about, all I could focus on, all that existed was how much I was in love with this woman.
And our love was mutual. It was like a spotlight or a halo that surrounded us.
And she had a name. Her name was Holly. And that is where I think my dream began to be more about my present situation.
Holly is an evergreen plant that grows in adverse conditions. The ancient Irish believed it to be the king of winter�as opposed to the Oak, which is king of the spring and summer months. Holly would be planted around the home as a means of spiritual protection.
Also, according to Celtic symbolism: "Holly leaves are very prickly, and deemed another metaphor for protection, vigilance, and stubborn victories won.
When you are feeling the walls cave in on you, call upon the holly. Invoke its protective qualities and you will soon find you no longer need be on the defensive. The holly will protect and bolster you to victory."
I can't say exactly what this dream means or if I should take it to be more than what it is. What I can say is that life growing out of adversity, spiritual protection and "stubborn victories won" are all things I could really use right now.
I think I am just going to let go of my reason for a little bit and claim these things for my own.
I might even buy some Holly for my house today.
And, if I allow myself to become really wistful, I may doze off just so that I can dance with my beautiful wife one more time.
7:28 a.m. - 2012-10-30
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