more and more i am becoming obsessed with the meaningless of what is normally considered life.
i need more words.
the words i have dont work.
recently i have been so full of emotion, but i cant articulate the smallest bit of it.
all i know is that everything i do seems pointless.
now, when i see a pretty girl, the very first thought that comes to mind is "i would despise you if i talked to you".
i hate how i am never alone, how i can never find solitude. even the mountains are full of people.
i hate being tied to car payments and rent and a steady job.
i am being oppressed by stability.
where is the nearest train for me to hitch a ride?
all of my attempts at spontaneity have been sadly predictable.
i suffocate in this plastic existence.
though this is all i see, this can't be all there is.
so i will keep trying to pick the door of life with my bare fingers,
until someone throws me a working key.
2:04 p.m. - 2004-08-22
Recent entries:
Awake in My Tiny Cage - 2014-11-03
God. - 2014-10-27
I remember me. - 2014-10-17
The Paper - 2014-10-13
A Post About Not Doing Anything - 2014-10-12
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