funny.
we choose to be anti-social.
i am sure that i could think up plenty of people to call.
i am also sure that out of all those people, one would be free tomorrow night.
and i am sure that whoever that person is, he/she and i could have a good deal of fun.
afterall, this is a city. there are plenty of things to do.
but for some reason i wont call anyone.
and if, by chance, someone called me, i am not so sure if i would agree to make plans with them.
i really dont know why.
i have never been as bored and lonely as i am at the present, but yet i still havent made a concious effort to change my present situation.
maybe i am just waiting for a call.
i mean, people know its my day off, people have my number, why should i always be the one to make plans?
besides i always feel like such a nuisance. hounding people for their time and all that.
or maybe its because i like the pain.
depression has a certain addictive qaulity to it.
i am not sure.
but i know that i am not alone in this.
there are others like me.
but i dont want to hang out with them, their depressing.
8:19 p.m. - 2003-11-05
Recent entries:
Awake in My Tiny Cage - 2014-11-03
God. - 2014-10-27
I remember me. - 2014-10-17
The Paper - 2014-10-13
A Post About Not Doing Anything - 2014-10-12
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