thelonious monk is playing on the stereo.
a young man with homer simpson house shoes is sleeping in one of our booths.
my hands smell like espresso.
this is my work.
the lights were dim.
the "regulars" as well as a few new people (one an attractive red head from england) joined in a casual semi-circle
some drums were being played.
occasionally one of us would recite some poetry.
some people burst into song.
for a short while there was some dancing to early nineties techno.
this is my life.
this is my emerging vison for christianity.
i keep picturing a room (coffeeshop, maybe?) full of people like me.
cynical, doubtful, sinful.
i see a no pressure (and i mean no pressure) non structured, non church affiliated hang out.
i want people to feel as comfortable as they did tonight.
but with Jesus thrown into the mix.
i have my doubts that it can happen.
people are trying it all the time.
the problem is christians are christians
and traditions are not easily broken.
our hangout would turn into a church.
if only i could remove Christ from the maintstream christian culture.
if only we could break free from the stain glass language
the sunday school mentalities
if only we could see Jesus for who he is...
(sigh)
i dont know how to make it happen.
i dont know how to be free from religion.
i dont know how to escape the american christianity i was born into.
i dont know if its possible to change it from the inside.
i feel like a revolutionary,
that already knows he is fighting a lost cause.
but is fighting nonetheless.
1:21 a.m. - 2003-08-23
Recent entries:
Awake in My Tiny Cage - 2014-11-03
God. - 2014-10-27
I remember me. - 2014-10-17
The Paper - 2014-10-13
A Post About Not Doing Anything - 2014-10-12
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