had a good day today. first one in a while. maybe its because i quit my job. yes, just two more weeks of graveyard hell and i will be free.
free to not make any money.
i need a new job
bad
in other thinking, God is teaching me. through his silence i am learning so much of who i am.
for instance i have learned this past weekend:
1. i equate what i do with who i am.
if you dont like the way i do something i take it to mean that you dont like me.
thats not good.
2. i often keep things inside and let them build, sometimes for years, and than i explode. often onto people who dont deserve it.
a good example is the whole drum playing thing. its not that big of a deal that i never get to play, but after years of no one believing that i can actually play the drums all my frustration came out. i even flipped someone off about it last night! i am like that with a lot of things. thats why i seem so laid back. i am just holding it in until i cant any more.
thats not good either.
so in my quest for transparency i have learned a lot of things about me i wish had stayed hidden. but these things have surfaced and must be dealt with. shoot i have the time.
so bear with me everyone as i work through my jerkiness. i will eventually come out alive, differant but alive
9:32 p.m. - 2002-03-11
Recent entries:
Awake in My Tiny Cage - 2014-11-03
God. - 2014-10-27
I remember me. - 2014-10-17
The Paper - 2014-10-13
A Post About Not Doing Anything - 2014-10-12
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