sweat dripped from his face as he climbed on top the hill. with deter mination in his eyes and a resiliance in his voice he stared straight up to the heavens and cried out. his recent circumstances all revolved around this moment. (and well for that matter the whole movie pretty much did too)
"who am i" jackie chan screamed. the answer would not be known for yet another half hour.
tonight i relate to our dear mr. chan. who am i? what is it that makes me me? i have asked the lord to search my heart and what has he found? take away my " brilliant stage presence" and my "deep intelluctal mind" and you will find that i am the same insecure, un-confidant, lazy, selfish individual i have always been. it does pain me to confess these things but more so to have them still present in my life. how much longer will i cover up my sins of depression, and jealousy. i cannot play the role of "ryan the all knowing all together spiritual super star" any more.
for those of you who read my ramblings. im sorry i sound so depressed. eventually i hope that God will show me some good encouraging things about me, instead of just sin.
pray for me
i gotta go or i will be late for work
10:11 p.m. - 2002-02-17
Recent entries:
Awake in My Tiny Cage - 2014-11-03
God. - 2014-10-27
I remember me. - 2014-10-17
The Paper - 2014-10-13
A Post About Not Doing Anything - 2014-10-12
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