I believe I have now gone almost two weeks without any feelings of depression or anxiety at all.
This may not sound like much, but since it's the longest I've lasted like this in probably well over a year, it's kind of a big feat.
I am writing this to remind myself not to rest on my laurels.
This is, after all, still very much a war.
Harvard psychologist Daniel Gilbert, in his book Stumbling on Happiness (which I very highly recommend), says that the non-depressed mind tends to project the future to be exactly like the present, except maybe better.
Those who suffer from depression, however, are generally painfully accurate in their predictions of what the future will be like. That little part of the brain that lies to us to make us feel better�by telling us that everything is always going to be alright forever�is broken.
This is both a good and bad thing, depending on what one does with it. For most people with depression, this can lead to feelings of hopelessness and fatalism. It can cause them to retreat into themselves and stop trying to change their lives.
What's the point, right?
However, I am now going to try to do something different.
I know that my feeling normal right now won't always last. I know that the shadows of depression are always lurking around a corner, waiting to overtake me at will.
I've likened my fight against it to be similar to trying to keep a campfire going all night to keep the wolves at bay. Eventually you get tired. Inevitably you are overcome.
This time though, I am going to try to use the little bit of daylight that I have to build some walls and protective fences.
This time I am going to build a bonfire and surround the perimeter with torches.
My only problem is that I have no idea how to do that.
Hopefully I figure it out in time.
This is a war I must win.
5:23 p.m. - 2012-11-11
Recent entries:
Awake in My Tiny Cage - 2014-11-03
God. - 2014-10-27
I remember me. - 2014-10-17
The Paper - 2014-10-13
A Post About Not Doing Anything - 2014-10-12
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